Miss Imperfect

The hate that Black women face on a global scale is not a new phenomenon. Colonization, chattel slavery in the U.S., and the Eurocentric standard that is upheld within the media, academia, professional world, and etc. have instilled the idea that Black women are less than. Scholar Moya Bailey was the first to coin the phrase “misogynoir”. Misogynoir is defined as specific hate or prejudice towards Black women.

If we look at misogynoir in a historical point of view, we realize that it has been present far before the term was even created. Throughout centuries of colonization and the uprising of white supremacy, it is noted that Black women are one of the most oppressed groups who face the most discrimination and prejudice within almost all societies, especially in the Western hemisphere. It is as if Black women are stripped of their humanity and only regarded as stereotypes and tropes such as the “welfare queen” or the “jezebel”. These stereotypes and ideas have been around for centuries and as society “progresses”, these stereotypes morph into the times as well. The jezebel or “mammy” may look different across decades, but their sentiment and the discriminatory meaning behind it stays the same. These two tropes that I stated may even expand into new meanings, such as a “city girl” or the elderly warm Black woman that many non-black individuals perceive as “non-threatening”.

But now more than ever, in my opinion, we see misogynoir right in front of our faces with the rise of social media that is accessible to many. Misogynoir has been implemented within the media since forever, but now it has been made accessible to those with a device and access to Wi-Fi. As someone in their early 20’s, I grew up with the internet and social media. I have had access to content ever since Middle School and since then, I have constantly seen misogynoir put on display, unapologetically. Humiliating Black women is a practice that has been accepted for centuries, so of course it would be displayed on apps such as Twitter and Facebook, because apparently everyone’s opinion on there is correct no matter how hateful or ignorant. We see misogynoir play out in different ways on these apps. It can be seen in video skits mocking Black women, social media statuses that state that Black women are “ugly” or “ghetto”, and Black women being berated by others for their features, skin tone, and opinions. I often think about how young Black women, or all Black women are impacted by social media telling them that they are not good enough, attractive enough, or intelligent. The treatment that Black women face on social media is a reflection of their treatment outside of it.

On top of being constantly dehumanized and subjected to discrimination on the internet, Black women also have to be exceptional to even deserve “respect” or to be seen as desirable. Our femininity is measured to those who are non-Black and we are often seen as more “masculine”. It is only when we possess features that are adjacent to the Eurocentric beauty standard, deviate from our Afrocentric features by means of makeup or surgery, or possess a body type that is sexually fetishized, we are seen as desirable. But, never as desirable as a woman who is not Black. This is the product of misogynoir and everyone, yes including Black people, participate in it.

Constantly having the desire to be exceptional or perfect is exhausting. It is mentally exhausting. Having these feelings are one of the main reasons why I titled this blog “Miss Imperfect”. During undergrad, I had realized that I was putting myself to an unhealthy standard. I had to be well-kept and have a face full of makeup while maintaining a certain GPA and having a well-polished social media all while holding two jobs and leadership roles on my campus. By the end of my first semester of my junior year, I found myself burnt out and angry. I took the radical step to take care of myself and not worry about the perceptions of others constantly. I learned that my sanity was far more important than being a “perfect”, exceptional Black woman. I feel as if a lot of Black woman should come to that realization as well.

Us as Black women should all realize that in this current state of society, we are faced with misogynoir no matter how beautiful or accomplished we are. It is best to focus on our own well-being and rejecting the harmful stereotypes we are labeled as.